


This Isn’t Goodbye

by pedromiamor



Series: Goodbyes [1]
Category: Narcos (TV)
Genre: Comfort, First Kiss, Goodbyes, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, sad boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-04
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 10:02:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29187498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pedromiamor/pseuds/pedromiamor
Summary: Steve says goodbye as Javier leaves Colombia after his bad rap with Los Pepes. Steve let’s his emotions get the best of him, and Javier makes a promise.
Relationships: Steve Murphy/Javier Peña
Series: Goodbyes [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2143110
Comments: 8
Kudos: 22





	This Isn’t Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> This is not my first fic but my first one on this site!!

Steve watches as Javier slowly swishes the contents of his beer bottle around and around. Neither of them have said a single word since they’ve sat down at a small table near the airport’s bar.

Javier’s staring out the window. He’s only taken one sip from his beer in the ten minutes they’ve been sitting here in silence. Steve notices the sadness in his eyes at having to leave Colombia when they’re so so close to finally getting Escobar. Steve half hopes that some of that sadness is reserved for him. He likes to think that Javier will miss him. 

Steve knows he’ll for sure miss Javier. 

“Quit starin’ at me like that Murphy. I can feel the pity without having to even look at you,” Javier mumbles. His eyes are still watching through the window. His hand still swishing his beer around. 

“It’s not fair Peña. You were here before anyone else. You are the most deserving of being there when we get that son of a bitch and they’re sending you home-”

“I made a mistake!” Steve closes his mouth as Javier finally turns to meet his eyes. They’re sad. They’re hurt, confused, and Steve thinks he sees longing. “I made a mistake and now I’m paying the price.”

“You thought you were doing the right thing.” Steve wants to reach across the table and grab Javier’s hand. Anything to comfort the man in front of him and even himself. 

Javier scoffs before taking a long pull from his now lukewarm beer. “Yeah? Well thinking you’re doing the right thing and actually doing the right thing are two different things Murphy.” 

Steve hates when he calls him Murphy. Murphy is for colleagues and assholes who don’t know a thing about him. Steve is for close friends and family, something he decides Javier is. That and he loves the way his name sounds coming out of Javier’s mouth. Something I’ll never hear again, he thinks. 

Steve takes a cigarette out of his pocket and quickly lights it, inhaling a large amount of smoke and exhaling shakily. 

Javier clears his throat. “Listen. You know if anyone comes askin’ about Los Pepes and who was involved, you’ll tell them you had no idea right? This is all on me. I don’t want anything bad happening on your end.”

Steve takes another drag from his cigarette and tries pushing the ache in his stomach away. “Yeah man. I’ll tell them where to shove it. Don’t start getting soft of me now and start worrying.” 

Javier’s mouth quirks in the tiniest of smiles and Steve’s heart sinks further. “Come on now Murphy. You know I don’t worry. Especially over you.” 

Steve offers the rest of his cigarette to Javier who takes it politely. “Yeah you keep tellin’ yourself that.” 

Javier smiles then. A true genuine smile that makes his sad eyes crinkle. Steve wants to frown, to yell, to scream this wasn’t how they were supposed to part, but he finds his lips quirking up as well. Javier is just too damn pretty. 

They don’t say anything for a while longer. Both sitting in comfortable silence with Steve stealing glances at Javier, trying to memorize his face. He knows he’ll probably never see him again. Javier meets his eyes once and raises a brow. Steve only shrugs.

Javier finally stops swishing his half-full beer around and glances at his watch. Steve notices the way his shoulders visibly tense and his gut clenches something awful. 

It’s time for Javier to go. 

Steve watches as Javier awkwardly stands, grabbing his bags, and lets out a frustrated sigh. “Just-” Javier stops short of whatever he was going to say and just looks at Steve. It’s painful, looking into his eyes. This is their goodbye. 

Steve stands to grasp Javier in a strong hug, inhaling all of his scent that he could and basking in his body warmth. “Just make sure you get him,” Javier whispers into his shoulder. 

Steve squeezes him tighter. “Of course Javi,” he whispers back, ignoring the way his voice cracks at the end. 

Javier gives him two pats on his back before releasing him. He doesn’t meet his partner’s eyes as he says, “Goodbye Steve.”

And then Steve is staring at Javier’s back walking further and further away from him and toward the plane back to America. Steve feels his heart breaking and the tears beginning to form in his eyes. He doesn’t break his gaze from Javier’s back until the man is out of sight. 

“Fuck,” Steve mutters as his heart began to pick up its pace. He couldn’t leave it like this. Not with some shitty goodbye in an airport bar that smelt of old people. Not without telling him how much his heart ached. Not without giving him a proper goodbye.

Steve begins running in the direction he watched Javier go, leaving the half-drunk beers and box of cigarettes behind. He weaves between people and tries to catch sight of that dark hair. Steve’s heart is racing. He needs to find Javier. 

He turns around the corner and enters an empty corridor. Well, almost empty. He spots that tight-assed dark-haired asshole at the end of the corridor and doesn’t stop running until he has his hand on said asshole’s shoulder. 

“Javi,” he breathes as he spins him around and grips his biceps, pushing him against the wall.

“Steve-” 

But his name is lost in a whimper as Steve eagerly presses himself against Javier and attacks his lips with his own. 

Javier’s hands immediately shoot up to cup Steve’s face and tangle in his precious blonde hair. He moans into Steve’s lips as a tongue brushes against the seam of his mouth. Javier eagerly opens his mouth as Steve licks his way inside and runs his hands up the smaller man’s arms. Their tongues tangle and their teeth clash. Javier keeps biting at Steve’s bottom lip until they both need to breathe and pull away panting. 

Steve keeps his eyes closed and rests his forehead against Javier’s. He brings a hand up to his face and runs a thumb along his cheek bone. 

“Steve?” Javier pants. 

Javier lets out a breath as Steve opens his eyes which are now brimming with tears. “Please Javi. Please promise me this won’t be the last time I see you. This can’t be goodbye.”

Javier nods his head and brushes the hair out of Steve’s face. “Okay. Okay Steve.”

Steve lets out a shaky laugh. “I think I’m in love with you Javi.” He sniffles really loud and wipes a lone tear from his cheek. “I can’t think of saying goodbye to you right now.”

Javier cups Steve’s face tighter and stares into the depths of his eyes. He can feel himself getting tearful. Leave it to Steve to turn him into a sap. “I promise you this isn’t goodbye. You get Escobar, and you come find me. I’ll be waiting for you Steve. You hear?”

Steve nods against him. “You don’t want to miss your flight.”

Javier runs his thumb across Steve’s cheek one last time before giving him a lingering chaste kiss full of all the emotions he’d felt for his partner since day one. “I think I’m in love with you too Steve.” 

Steve wipes his face again and steps away from Javier with a sad smile. Javier picks his bags up once more and nods at Steve. “I’ll see you soon.”

Steve watches Javier’s back once more as he walks further and further away from him. Javier glances back at him just once with a loving smile before he rounds the corner and is gone. 

“See you Javi.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think and thanks for reading 💞💞


End file.
